Choosing to Live

A friend's daughter recently experienced losing her boyfriend. It seems his interest in her was replaced by something or someone else. Understandably, my friend is going through the emotions that most mothers would under such circumstances. She grieves the loss of innocence. Her daughter was a young lady who had trusted easily. Would she ever be able to enter into a relationship without calculating the possibility of risk because of this breakup?

Unexpected questions occurred to me as I listened to my friend. Can we ever really choose to trust if we don't know the risk of a broken trust? For that matter, can we choose to love if we haven't felt the sting of loss? Can we choose to forgive if we have not experienced the angst of someone's sin against us?

I'm not trying to suggest that we aren't capable of such things if we haven't experienced emotional losses. As an example, when I became a mother, I was immediately engulfed by the emotions that are natural for new mothers. It didn't take losing a child to love the way a mother just naturally loves. Nevertheless, something powerful happens when we choose to risk in spite of broken promises, wounded memories, and long lost loves -- the kinds of things known not only to the intellect, but also to a pierced heart.

In the Scriptures, Paul taught that above all, three things hang around and just sort of continue to present themselves as possibilities to us: faith, hope and love. Interestingly enough, preceding that proclamation, he explained the futility of livng without them. Any good we could ever hope to achieve without these virtues, Paul warns is just emptiness manifesting in all its futility.

It begs the question, why would anyone choose to live in the throes of futility. Could it be because of the risk of choosing to believe? Choosing to hope? Choosing to give and receive love? Jesus warns us that trouble will come. But why must it come? The answer to this question is far more than my brain can wrap itself around. However, I am growing more certain that pain gives us the opportunity to choose. A heart broken is a heart that chooses. Sometimes the offense drives our hearts into a period of cold and harsh hibernation. Often we've made these choices long before our conscious minds can even understand there has been an offense. Sadly, in our oblivious state the essence of who we are is often rendered impotent of divine oomph.

The broken can also choose to trust. That scorned heart can embrace forgiveness. That lonely soul can determine to be loved, and to love in return. These are the possibilities that lead us out of futility and darkness and into the quality of life that so easily escapes us. Because of Christ, each and every troublesome offense comes bundled together with a lifeline to choose. When He submitted Himself to the Cross, He also submitted Himself to the Resurrection. His actions permanently removed the sting of death. Not just of physical death – but also the kind of death our hearts endure with each rejection, every offense, all of the trouble this world serves up.

God could have done it differently. Perhaps, if He was a bit insecure about being able to handle our pain, I imagine He could have worked it out fairy tale style with everyone living happily ever after. Yet as King David laments, we are certain to endure seasons of tears, though our joy will eventually come.

Scripture explicitly states that God is profoundly moved by our tears, so it isn’t a lack of compassion or concern that keeps Him from placing a divine ban on all heart attacks. We are left to assume then, that our tears must be important. Our choosing is important. Our hearts are important. This is, after all, the redemptive work that Christ made possible. The choice to live -- not just some day far away when we reach our heavenly home, but here and now. The choice to be the glorious men and women that God made us to be. King David cried out for God to reveal any damaging choices he might be holding in his heart. Why? Because he knew the futile existence that comes about by a heart that fails to choose these healing virtues.

The pain of this world can seem almost unbearable at times. Yet when the choice is made to continue to live life through the lens of redemption, we also receive a head start to the glorious rest of our lives. Instead of the sting of death, we are filled with the power of hope and faith and love. And we're reminded that we are truly alive.